How to Help Your Child Navigate Puberty
September 30, 2026By: Dr. V. Sushma Chamarthi, MD, FAAP, DABOM
Categories: Parenting
Puberty can be a confusing, emotional and sometimes overwhelming time. This is the case not only for the children experiencing it, but for the adults helping guide them through it as well. While every child’s experience with puberty is unique, there are ways the adults in their lives can help them navigate it. In girls, puberty typically begins between the ages of 8 and 13 and in boys, between ages of 9 and 14. Here is what you should know to help make the transition smoother, healthier and more empowering for your child!
Start the conversation early and keep it going
Puberty doesn't happen all at once, and the conversations about it shouldn't either. Consider keeping things open and casual instead of having one “big talk.” Using everyday moments like shopping for deodorant or noticing growth spurts can be natural openings to these conversations. Kids may act embarrassed to discuss these things, but knowing they have a trusted adult to speak about them with is deeply beneficial.
Normalize physical and emotional changes
Children need reassurance that the changes they are seeing in their body are normal. Growth spurts, new body odors, mood swings and skin changes are all a part of the process of growing up. In girls, breast development, pubic and underarm hair, widening of the hips and the onset of menstrual periods are also expected milestones. In boys, growth of the testes and penis, pubic and facial hair, voice deepening and increased muscle mass are equally normal changes. If you notice these changes, avoid reacting with surprise or teasing. This leads to self-consciousness and negative self-talk. Instead, keep the door open for conversations by encouraging questions – even the awkward ones.
Encourage healthy habits and hygiene
Puberty can be a great time to help children build habits that contribute to their confidence. Help your child build routines to help them manage all that comes with puberty. Deodorant, oral health, hair, skin and shower routines can help your child go into puberty with the confidence and independence that they need to succeed.
Support their emotional health and big emotions
Puberty can bring up a lot of emotions. With changing bodies and hormones, it is natural to have bigger emotions and feelings. Let your child know it is okay to feel this way, and it won’t last forever. That said, if mood changes are severe, persistent or significantly interfering with school, friendships or daily activities, it is worth reaching out to your child's pediatrician, as further evaluation may be warranted. It is also important to respect their privacy during this time and let them know you are there as a safe space whenever they are ready.
Know when to contact your child's pediatrician
While most changes are a normal part of development, some signs are worth discussing with your child’s pediatrician. Signs of early (precocious) puberty include breast development before age 8 in girls or testicular enlargement before age 9 in boys. Delayed puberty may be a concern if there are no signs of development by age 13 in girls or age 14 in boys. In either case, your pediatrician can evaluate whether any further workup is needed and offer reassurance along the way.
The most important thing to remember as a parent while your child is navigating puberty is that change is okay and that your presence is everything. Being available, open and patient with your child as their body changes is the best support. Remember, kids aren't looking for perfect explanations; they just need consistent support from someone who cares.
